Getting over Fear

As promised, this post is going to be about Fear. We all experience fear, but it’s how we deal with that fear that truly makes us who we are.

Last time I talked about Doubt and how its trying to hold me back. Well, Doubt is able to make me question everything, Fear has the ability to paralyze me if I let it. Fear of people not liking my book. Fear of never being published. Fear that my writing isn’t good enough. Here’s a little tip that I tell myself whenever Fear tries to get in my way: I remind myself that as of now all of these things could be true. I am not published and if I don’t try, I never will be. I won’t know if people like my book or writing if I don’t let them read it. My fears are irrational and I just have to keep telling myself that.

Sometimes, in order to push myself I will use my fear as a challenge. If I’m afraid of how someone will view my writing, I will give it to someone to read. I tell myself to keep going because I made it this far (i.e finishing the novel) so I might as well continue my editing. It is the only way I will know for sure if my writing is good enough.

It’s easy to let Fear take over and hold you back. I could give up on my writing right now and no one would be the wiser, except me. I am in that stage where I write for myself. I read a quote the other day that said, “Write what you want because no one cares.” I have this quote hanging on my wall as a reminder that I can do what I want. Now is the time to embrace my fear and just go for it because at this moment I have nothing to lose.

How do you get over your fear?

A demon called Doubt

That demon has been creeping into my head again. I am sure all you writers know exactly what demon I am talking about. It slithers like a snake and whispers terrible thoughts into your ear. Making you question every word or idea you have previously loved. You feel like you are on the right track and then Doubt comes along and changes everything.

I am in the middle of revising my novel and Doubt has decided to take up residence in my mind. Doubting whether my writing will ever be good enough? Are my characters strong enough? Does my plot make sense? Will other people like my novel? I am finding it hard to fight this demon off. I have to remain strong and positive or I am never going to finish this novel, but Doubt is trying its best to kill my motivation. I worked on my novel all day on Friday and I reached a point where I had to turn my computer off and walk away.

I am now fighting through another one of my chapters and Doubt refuses to leave my side. I get so frustrated that I want to scream sometimes. I refuse to let Doubt win. I am pushing through this chapter. I will win, I will win…win win win! This is all I can do to keep myself going. That and chant, “my writing matters to me.”

Have any of you had this experience? If so, what did you do to overcome it?
Next time I will talk about Doubt’s older, stronger brother known as Fear.

Sherlock and Watson: The first bromance?

I was reading Sherlock Holmes on my nook when I realized it only had the first twelve adventures. I went to the book store today and I found a complete Sherlock Holmes edition with the original illustrations!

I know Sherlock Holmes is a classic, but I had never read any of the stories before. I have seen both of the movies, which were great in my opinion. The more I read about Sherlock Holmes, the more I can see Robert Downy Jr. He really makes a perfect Sherlock Holmes. He portrayed his cynicism and arrogant personality really well.

I love figuring out the relationship between Sherlock and Watson. Arthur Conan Doyle created two characters who will do anything for the other one. Watson always comes with Sherlock even when he knows it’s dangerous and I think Sherlock finds comfort in Watson coming with him. He always warns Watson of the possible danger, but I think he knows Watson will still come along. It’s refreshing to read a friendship that doesn’t get destroyed by a female, at least I don’t think it does. Sherlock and Watson might have possibly been the first “bromance” in history.

The details in his characters mostly come to life through their actions and dialogue. And the creativity that goes into these mysteries, amazes me. For example, a woman being killed by a snake, which has been trained to climb through a vent and down a rope…I can’t stop reading, wondering what the next mystery and solution will be. So if you’re in the mood to read a classic with a mystery, then I highly recommend you take a look at Sherlock Holmes.

Why I love author interviews and chats

Have you ever taken time to participate in a live chat or read interviews from your favorite authors? If not, you should because there can be a lot to be learned by picking the brains of your favorite writers.

Goodreads is a great website to read author interviews or even participate in the live chats. I have read interviews from Cassandra Clare, Rachel Vincent, Becca Fitzpatrick, and many more. I love hearing how these books that I love so much have come to exist. Reading about published authors’ hardships and trials they encountered during their road to being published gives me hope.

For example: Did you know most authors have over a hundred rejections before they get someone to accept their manuscript? Their persistence and hope seems to be the only thing that keeps these amazing authors from giving up.

These interviews have taught me I need to believe in myself. I need to be patient and keep writing. Most importantly, I can’t give up, no matter what. Could you imagine life without Stephen King? I mean he is the King of scary novels. It took him over 700 rejection letters before someone saw the potential and now he’s a bestselling author.

Also, participating in live chats gives you the chance to ask your favorite authors about their own writing process. Becca Fitzpatrick answered a question I had about the Query letter and she told me good luck on my book! Most authors have blogs or websites nowadays, so it’s easier to contact them. But they get hundreds if not thousands of emails a day, so asking them during a live chat will be quicker.

Well I’m off to read another interview, I just can’t get enough of them!

Getting stronger every day

I think I figured out why I am having such a hard time editing. When I write I listen to music, which keeps me in my own zone. Music actually helps my ideas flow better for whatever reason. When I edit I need my full concentration because I am not just writing words down on a page. I am making sure everything makes sense, checking grammar, and everything in between.

I need the silence, but at the same time the silence is deafening. I have been fighting the urge to constantly play some music while I am editing. I know I just need to push through it. I was able to edit three more chapters today, so it is still coming along. I feel my descriptions are getting stronger with every chapter, which is also a good thing for me.

I have sent my edited chapters to some friends to get second and third opinions. I am still afraid to show people my work, but I am no longer letting the fear hold me back. It never hurts to see what others will say about my work, as long as it’s constructive criticism and not just negative feedback. My roadblocks are slowly becoming stepping stones leading me in the right direction.

Morning solitude

I would not consider myself a morning person, but there is something I love about the early morning hours between 4-6:30. It’s very peaceful and for whatever reason a great time for me to wake up and work on my novel. I don’t wake up at these hours very often, but every time I do I can get a lot accomplished in those few hours before the sun comes up.

The world is still asleep and I am not constantly plagued by the random sounds of living in an apartment building. I am free to reflect quietly on my writing. If you have ever woken up during these hours then I am sure you know what I am talking about. If you have not tried writing during these hours then I recommend that you do.

Perfect endings

I finished the Hunger Games and…Wow! It was messy and I knew not everyone could get a happy ending, but it was a satisfying one. Some people think the ending is all that matters. I happen to be one of those people. An ending can define if the series was worth your time reading. Audiences will usually feel cheated if questions are left unanswered and conflicts are left unresolved. I don’t agree that everything has to end perfectly happy, but it does have to have it’s own perfect ending. For Mockingjay it was about Katniss learning how to survive and of course choosing which guy she’d end up with.

I read that Suzanne Collins wanted to show the affects war has on children. I feel that she accomplished this in The Hunger Games Trilogy very well. This book was about a war and in war people die. No one is considered safe or off limits, which is also true in any finale of a series. I was very surprised by Mockingjay’s ending and I wasn’t disappointed. However, I did end up crying, but if you haven’t read the books yet I won’t spoil it for you.

I am a fan of the tragic open endings myself. This means important people die, but there is still hope for the main character at the end. These are the books that will make you cry and want to rip up the pages, but at the same time love every minute of that pain. I love writer’s who aren’t afraid to kill their characters. It takes a lot of guts to get rid of these people you spent months or even years creating. The characters become like your children and now that I have been writing I can understand this sentiment. You want to see your characters happy because you fall in love with them and you want everyone to love them too. The hard truth is some characters serve their purpose better by dying. I have always known how I would end my novel, but I have been playing with it more and more recently. There are things I want to do, but I’m not sure if I will have the courage to pull them off in the end. What type of endings do you like to read?

Editing = Progress

I have officially edited five chapters. The best part is I have yet to destroy an entire chapter in anger. I really feel like this is the best version yet. In the past I would have reread everything and wanted to start over, so this is a step in the right direction.

I feel like everything is making sense. It is much easier to go back through and add descriptions once I know what I want to be revealed and what I plan on saving for later. I also have a better sense of my characters through their dialogue and actions. A lot of people seem to story board, which makes it easier to add foreshadowing. My best ideas come in the middle of me writing a chapter, so I’m not sure if story boarding will help me. I suppose it doesn’t really matter as long as I know what I am doing and I am able to keep everything in line.

I keep a notebook next to my bed, so whenever an idea pops into my head I can just write it down. It is very hard not immediately working on the second part of the story, but I know if I want to see it published I need to finish polishing the first part and put all of my effort into that. Once I have sent it out to someone I will have plenty of time to write more waiting on an answer. Anyone have any advice to give about the editing process?

New Year's Resolution

Okay so I know this post is a little late since New Year’s Day is over, but it is still the new year, so I am going to write about my resolution anyways.

In the past my new year’s resolution has usually been about eating healthier or going to the gym more often, like millions of other people in the world. I am going to be honest those resolutions never lasted the month, so I am going to try something a little different this year.

My new year’s resolution is going to be about my writing. I will continue to write every day. I will finish editing my first draft. And I will send it off at least once to a literary agent. These are pretty big resolutions, but I know that if I stick to them I will be able to accomplish my goals for this year. This year is going to be all about my writing. I will pour my tears, sweat, and blood into my writing and hopefully by the end of this year I can look back and say this was a good year. What are your writing resolutions?

Good Distractions

I edited my third chapter yesterday. This editing has taken a lot longer than I thought it would. It’s taking longer to edit the chapters than it did to write them in the first place. I can’t exactly say I’m blameless for the process taking so long. I keep getting distracted by books.

First Bloodrose by Andrea Cremer, the third and final book in the Nightshade trilogy came out, so of course I couldn’t do anything else until I read the entire book. I have to say I loved it. If you haven’t read it yet I recommend you do so immediately. It’s definitely a book that pulls on your heartstrings.

I have also gotten into the dystopian genre recently. I must say I was a little iffy on these books at first, but now I can’t stop reading them. I read Delirium by Lauren Oliver. It’s about a society that believes love is a disease. Everyone gets the “cure” for the disease when they turn 18. Each person is evaluated, which then determines her entire life. This includes career path, marriage partner, and how many kids. If you don’t get the “cure” or fight against it you will be marked as an “empathizer” which guarantees you a life of solitary confinement or a public execution. Delirium starts with a girl who can’t wait to be “cured” when she meets a boy who shows her there is nothing wrong with love in fact the idea that it needs to be cured is the problem with society. One of my favorite quotes in the book says, “Hate is not the worst thing indifference is.” The second installment in the series, Pandemonium comes out later this year. I can’t wait to read it.

I am still in the process of reading the Hunger Games Trilogy by Suzanne Collins. I just finished the first book and I can’t put the second one down. I was excited to see the movie before and after reading the books I can’t wait! Katniss is a badass and I wish I had her archery skills. Not to mention her ability to survive in the wild. I couldn’t imagine growing up in a world where the government can take your kids and place them in a fight-for-the-death competition for its entertainment.

So as you can see I have been very busy reading. I really need to get back on track and edit my own stuff if I ever want to see it published. What books have you been distracted by recently?